From Fists to Friendship: The Unexpected Depth of Todo and Itadori
Meaning in a Parasocial Fantasy
The following contains spoilers for Season 1, Episode 15.
What makes a brutal, bone-crushing fight between two strangers unexpectedly heartwarming? Watching Jujutsu Kaisen’s Yuji Itadori and Aoi Todo made me laugh, reflect, and feel deeply—all in one episode. Let me share my thoughts so far, and if you’d like to hear more, drop a comment!
Aoi Todo vs. Yuji Itadori
Yuji Itadori and Aoi Todo first met in the forest during a fight. Initially, Todo was trying to murder Itadori. The beating was brutal, but Itadori getting up despite the pummeling surprised Todo and granted Itadori a bit of respect. Even so, Todo had to perform his sniff test: What is your taste in women? Lucky for Itadori, as weird as the question is, he doesn’t mind sharing.
As it happens, his taste in women—like Jennifer Lawrence—struck a chord. Finally, Todo had met someone who unashamedly shared his exact taste in women. For this one moment, maybe the first in a very long time, Todo felt understood.
The following scene is wonderful. And funny.
Todo imagines showing Itadori a new shonen manga.
Then, he imagines telling Itadori that he plans to ask his idol, Takada-chan, to marry him. Despite Itadori’s concerns, he decides to confess anyway.
What’s even more endearing—as it is funny—is that this absolute brute of a man is a lot more sensitive than he seems. Actually, he’s quite the insightful character. Itadori asks why he thinks there’s even the slightest chance a celebrity idol like Takada would reciprocate Todo’s feelings, and he whips out a quote from Anne Sullivan:
“What fool thinks of defeat before even trying?”
In Todo’s fantasy, he confesses his love to Takada-chan, but she expresses that she already loves someone else.
Venting to Itadori, still somewhat in denial, Todo asks, “Is there any chance that the one she loves is me?” Itadori’s response is a rather flat and certain “No.”
All Itadori does is slap Todo on the back of the head and offer to buy him ramen.
And that’s it. That’s all Aoi Todo wanted and probably all he needed.
When the fantasy ends—which likely lasted only seconds in real time—Todo exclaims that they are now best friends.
This scene was hilarious. I was dying of laughter the first time I watched it, but I was also emotionally affected just the same. It could be that I was high, but I don’t think that’s it either. As often is the case with moments like this, there’s more depth than you might immediately suspect. Todo is an extremely rash and disagreeable character. It’s a funny contrast that he loves a stereotypically eccentric, flamboyant, and childish female idol. It goes to show how seriously he takes this sort of thing, and he doesn’t seem to care that no one can understand or relate to him. He just takes it like a champ—training, fighting, and treading on all the same. Yet Itadori moves him to tears.
Depth Behind Humor
Please let me explain to you why I think Todo fantasized about a friendship with Itadori, and not anyone else. Why does someone have to agree with his taste in women just to be a good friend? If someone had preferences too divergent from Todo’s own taste, then he probably wouldn’t take them seriously. What good does someone’s attempt at comforting do if they don’t understand the struggle Todo has to begin with? Nothing.
I read a book recently that one of my friends loaned me, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. I was already aware of this book and most of its key points, although I had never read it myself. I read it for the first time just recently, and it reinforced some interesting insights into humanity’s sexually dimorphic psychology and how we can navigate through these differences to coexist peacefully—as a team rather than as adversaries. The book mentions that a common masculine trait is to seldom take advice unless it comes from someone who has earned their respect. More specifically, asking for help is the last resort, and it must come from someone considered a professional or expert in their field. I believe this is how Todo is thinking when he “evaluates” all of his peers by asking them their taste in women. He wants to see who else might get him, because if they do, then they might be able to provide something he so clearly wants:
Friendship.
I hope you guys don’t read too much into the gender differences here, as I totally think women can relate to this experience too! It is just my anecdotal experience that seems to be reinforced through everything I read and listen to. This is a moment that resonates with me, as a guy. And I do think it is the male instinct inside of me that wants this.
What hits me even more powerfully from this humorous scene is that Todo seems to understand the nature of his admiration and devotion to his idol is not going to end well. It’s as though he knew in his heart what the result will be when he confesses. Funny as this is, at least to the point of the anime I’m at now, Todo’s fantasy seems highly accurate to their characters. I believe something like that would happen, just as Todo imagined.
And he knew how he’d cope with the rejection. He knew that he’d still hold on to that linger of hope, and he’d need a tough and brutally honest guy whom he respects like Itadori, to tell him straight. A homie to knock some sense into him, even if that means giving him a little smack (I do not condone doing this if your homie doesn’t vibe with this expression of love, so be mindful), and to offer to buy him some food.
What happens afterwards moves me even more. And this is something I am sure a lot more males will probably identify with than females do, but please share with me how you feel regardless of where you fit in gender expression or what your chromosomes are! Todo still fights Itadori without holding back. The only thing that changes from his new found respect is Todo giving Itadori advice during their battle. He wants to see his homie win, and to be a worthy opponent. They can grow together. This is just like me when my cousins and friends used to play Smash Bros. The competitive drive with homies is such a magical experience to me, even if they misunderstand my frustration with growing with genuine anger or jealousy of other’s skills.
Competitive Friendships
Todo still fights Itadori without holding back. The only thing that changes, from his newfound respect, is Todo giving Itadori advice during their battle. He wants to see his homie win, and to be a worthy opponent. They can grow together. This is just like me when my cousins and friends used to play Super Smash Bros. The competitive drive with homies is such a magical experience to me, even if they misunderstand my frustration with growing as genuine anger or jealousy of others’ skills.
I met one of my best friends through Super Smash Bros. He beat me consistently, all the while telling me that he didn’t really care much for the game. Actually, he seemed to actively dislike it. Such a shame that all these friends I had did nothing but shit on this video game that they also played religiously. Funny, I think it was Arthur Schopenhauer who said that we tend to dislike what we are predisposed to be good at. Anyway, that is an article for another time.
I asked my newfound best friend why he kept playing this game with me if he didn’t like it. The most memorable response he gave was: “I like seeing you get better!” This may sound offensive. But it wasn’t. Somehow I sensed the sincerity in what he meant.
Why Itadori and Todo’s Bond Is Special
Todo’s fantasy reveals how deeply he values the bond of mutual understanding. Itadori’s bluntness and honesty ground Todo, even as they spar. This dynamic shows the power of competitive friendships: pushing each other to improve, respecting each other’s strengths, and offering support, even if it’s delivered with a smack on the head.
Itadori was understandably confused that this dude, who was literally beating him into a pulp with murderous rage, suddenly started crying and exclaimed that they’re best friends. All because Itadori said he likes tall women with a nice big ass. But then something else happened. Todo started giving Itadori advice as they fought. He hyped him up, pointed out his weaknesses, and gassed him up when Itadori improved. The fighting became more like a dance, a sparring match that helped both of them grow.
I don’t care what anyone says. This is fabulous, and sick as fuck. I don’t want to spoil too much, but what happens next was one of the coolest, most fun, and relatable moments I have ever seen in any anime in my entire life. It’s worth the watch.
Final Thoughts
Men are typically goal-oriented, which is why we find respect in those who are driven and competent. It also extends into competitive interactions with other men. I think men suppress their empathetic emotions a little too much, but that doesn’t mean this concept of rivalry and competitive bonding is a bad thing. Actually, it was this very concept, displayed through both Itadori and Todo, that probably saved their lives.
Who knows? Maybe it saved mine too ;p
This article is dedicated to my best friends who have encouraged me in the best ways you knew how. They were and still are effective to me. Todo reminds me of one friend in particular, but the more I watched, the more he reminds me of a culmination of so many elements from several brotherly figures I’ve had in my life. I will never forget this and never take it for granted.
Works Cited
Gray, J. (1992). Men are from Mars, women are from Venus: A practical guide for improving communication and getting what you want in your relationships. HarperCollins.
I didn't know what to make of Todo when I first started this show, but this episode completely changed my perspective. Todo just seemed like overly-masculine and brazen and tough type of character. But this episode really shows insight to the true Todo and his inner thoughts. The whole fantasy had me both laughing so hard, but also warmed my heart that Todo created a whole fantasy of him and Yuji being besties. This bromance feels like a display of what a healthy and positive male relationship can look like. I admire how Todo is constantly challenging Yuji and giving advice--all for the sake of helping his best friend become a better person. It's both hilarious and heartfelt.
Love it 😁 just re-affirmed my decision to recommend your writing on here!
Not just good taste in philosophy but a good perspective on story telling in anime? 10/10 😄✌️